Two Glasses of Wine

In one week Halle will be 6 months. It's time for an update on life at 6 months post partum with child #2.


Over all we're doing well. The day after the second of the two babies arrived I suddenly felt super tired and extremely grouchy. It was kind of a release like when you get sick after you finish writing all of your exams, or after you've finished your last report card. Your body doesn't need to hold out any longer. I was relieved that both babies and mums were healthy and also that Paul had wrapped everything up before he was to leave. But therein lies the crux of the matter. Paul gone, for three weeks. It hit me hard that it would be all me and there would be no rest before he left - for him or me.

Day one I was still tired and grouchy but we had supper over at Caroline, Stu, Cerys and baby Ffion's house. That helped except both Anneka and Cerys were CRAZY and fought like fiends and played like lunatics. They are both quite strong personalities and are like siblings with one another.

Last night I was asleep a little earlier - 10 - and so felt a little less tired this morning. I thought my friends were coming today and so organized the editing/liveing room and cleaned downstairs and broke down boxes and stacked ply wood and boards left over from building projects, shop vacuumed everywhere, and generally got the place in decent shape. Our old fixer-up house is endless work.

It turns out they aren't arriving until tomorrow so I am ahead of the game. After lunch Anneka and Halle both went down for a two hour nap and I passed out for an hour on the couch. I felt and feel much better now. I played outside with the girls, made supper on the BBQ, ate on the deck and then we went for a walk.


Halle is generally doing great, but she has presented us with a couple of challenges in the past couple of week and I'm sure it's the lead up to that 6 month developmental leap. She has gone easily to others and been passed around a lot as a baby but just recently she makes strange and clings to me like a little koala bear. Daddy is OK, she clings to him too...I hope she doesn't forget him. Also, for a week her naps were really off and it was impossible to get her to sleep before ten. She's getting a little better in that department. Part of what is making me a bit more tired is that I stay up late and Halle wakes up at 5 or 6 for almost an hour before she goes back to sleep. I am then woken again by Anneka at about 7:30. I also seem to need a lot of sleep these days. During this wakeful period Halle rolls around all over the bed having a great time. She sometimes ends up completely turned around at the food of the bed - that babe can move!

Halle has been quite an easy baby and even these more turbulent times with her aren't bad. I think Anneka trained me well. Anneka was and is, a spirited child. Both girls were/are very smiley babies that clearly love to laugh and have fun. But Anneka as a baby also had a temper and a will and a huge desire to experience the world ... I don't know how many times I can recall people including strangers commenting on her bossy behaviour, even as a 6 month old. On the flip side strangers all over were dazzled by her smile and charmed by her antics. She never wanted to miss out on anything and was/is a very bright little girl. Halle is also a charmer and eager to learn, but is a bit more easy going.

Both my babies had a great need to suck to sooth (Halle less so) and so I used a soother. I really didn't like the soother and weaned Anneka at 6 months. She was then able to put herself to sleep without it. Although she now will crawl into bed with me to cuddle at any opportunity, as a baby and toddler she was quite an independent sleeper. When tired she would never rest her head on my shoulder and relax into sleep. She would push herself away and fight it all the way.

Halle likes to be close and I have made no effort to move her out of our bed. She easily relaxes into me when tired and is a super snuggler. She nursed to sleep easily and seemed to have less fondness for the soother and more for her fingers. With the onset of teething and the recent difficulty falling asleep at night she has suddenly developed a real want of the soother at bed times. I just don't worry about these things with Halle. I'll lie her down on the bed or in her playpen with the soother and her favourite blanket, go read to Anneka, come back and she'll often be asleep. If it's what works for her now, so be it.

These days Halle really likes to sit and play. She pulls toys out of the basket and rocks forward on her bum. She reaches as far as she can in front of her and leans onto her heals. She also throws her arms over her head and squeals. She loves to stand and steps one foot in front of the other. She wants nothing more then to have me prop her against things so she can stand. She sometimes squeals and lunges for her jolly jumper.

For the past month she's eaten little bits of avocado, sweet potato and banana, but not regularly. Today I steamed, pureed and froze some orange sweet potato as she is really wanting to be fed and I guess I should start doing it more regularly. I think I will wait a couple of weeks before I make her brown rice or quinoa porridge. I grind the whole grains and they can be hard to digest until at least six months.


Anneka is, even more than usual, full of beans. She is cracking me and others up. At Charlotte's yesterday she was the only one who wasn't tired and grouchy. She hammed it up in the living room, kissed everybody good bye on the legs, ankles and feet, announced to the room that I needed to go get Halle from Gramma, give Gramma a kiss on the cheek and tell her that I would see her later and then go. She made a chipmunk face and gave chipmunk kisses.

And so with a chipmunk kiss I am signing off. Staying up this late, I am sure to be tired tomorrow!

Three Cheers...

For Little Girls! Hip Hip Hooray for Birth and Babies! Two more baby girls to add to the clan. Two amazing births and two amazing women. Lucky me to be part of it.

Caroline had her baby at 3:30 am Wednesday at Lion's Gate (smoo

th and fast labour and delivery - her second) and Charlotte at 9:10 pm yesterday. Charlotte had a water birth in her living room with many of the UBC Salmo Court neighbourhood girls coming in to visit her with Amelia. Halle and I spent from about 1:30pm until the baby was born with Charlotte and Jesse and my mom was there from about 4pm. The midwife arrived at 5pm. Amelia played with her neighbour friends and got ready for bed at their place, but came back home shortly before the baby was born. She didn't want to be in the room while her mom was pushing the baby out but stood leaning out her bedroom window shouting "My mom is pushing the baby out!" into the courtyard. It was awesome.

Victoria, Amelia and Javiera with the cake they made for the baby.

Waiting

For the past couple of weeks I've been "at home" with the girls. Paul has been working on various projects often from the house. There is more of a rhythm to the day - to theirs and mine. Sometimes I need to get out of town and we head to Stanley Park or to visit with Char and Amelia (last Sunday was Amelia's party), or with the better weather, we have been going to Alice Lake. If we have no plans, we often run into someone on our walks. There are certainly no shortage of kids to hang out with and fortunately, there are some pretty cool moms out there. There are great walks around here, the library and of course many coffee shops. I also try to accomplish thing around the house usually with little success.

We'll do this for a couple of more weeks and then spend a week or two in Victoria. Paul will be away in Chile at that time filming (lucky bastard!). I'm feeling a bit sleepy these days as I can't seem to get more than 3 hours sleep at a stretch and it would be nice to have the grandparents around so I can sleep in or nap! Halle is waking more frequently and lately hasn't been settling again as quickly. She'll sometimes sleep longer than three hours at the beginning of the night, but she's asleep around 8 and I'm not ready for bed.

I'm enjoying the girls having a bit of a routine. Halle naps three times a day and Anneka has an afternoon nap. Anneka has gotten really good at putting herself to sleep for a nap again - she was getting run down and getting infections - bladder, ear, eye then cold sores on her tonque - and I asked the doctor to tell her that the best medicine was sleep! I call bedtime for both of them 8 o'clock, but we often don't have them in bed until a bit later. However, I'm not against blowing off the routine and spending the whole day at the lake if we're having a good time.

So there's a rhythm and we're waiting. Well I'm waiting: waiting for Charlotte and Caroline to have their babies (due Sunday and Monday, respectively). I'd love to be 39 weeks and waiting for signs of labour and I'd love to give birth again. I won't though. But I can be excited for them. I am on call to look after both Amelia and Cerys. Charlotte may have Amelia attend some of the birth depending on how things go. Caroline has now asked me if I'd like to attend her birth instead of look after Cerys and of course I would. Last night on the phone when I realized she was building up to ask me, I got really giddy. I am totally honored and completely into it! We'll see how things unfold and how the story goes. How exciting...two little babes on the way, so much love to share!

Do You Like to Party? YES!

What fun: two birthday parties at Alice Lake in one day on opposite sides of the lake. Cerys turned three and Ciahni turned four. Anneka, Halle and I set up "camp" at Cerys' (Paul was filming again today) and stroller walked to Ciahni's then back - circumnavigating the lake. It really was a great day. Having "slept in" until eight, Anneka was in a stellar mood and has been going strong all day. Now she is chillin' watching Sesame Street. It's interesting with Anneka - sometimes she can act a bit shy and hold my hand and stick close and other times she joins right in with kids she doesn't know, talks a lot and initiates and organizes play. The former behaviour is usually when she doesn't know any kids and adults predominate. I was surprised by her yesterday at a potluck/clothing swap and today at both birthday parties at her self assuredness, exuberance and confidence. Most of the kids were new to her and older, yet she seemed extremely comfortable and completely herself. She is beginning to explore further and further away from me, so I am having to watch her carefully.

Halle also had a great day. She is just so freakin' cute and is growing up so fast. She loves the other kids and all the activity and gets about as involved as a babe of five months can. I hope Stu got some good pictures of her. She is sitting well and played with the sand in the shallow water. Of course fist fulls went into her mouth and lake water too! One of our public health nurses was there so feeling a bit lax about my parenting I checked in with her. She didn't think it was a problem. I grew up a naked rolly polly dirty babe in Swaziland and I think this freedom is now part of my psyche.

All went well until the last 20 minutes when Halle pooped the dish clothh I had her bum wrapped in (I brought everything but the kitchen sink and diapers) and was screaming as I carried her across the grass to wash her bum. It was quite a scene. Halle seems so chill and happy and then she lets it fly - it makes everyone scramble to her rescue. Someone brought over a diaper as I was trying to squish her mini bum into an even smaller rag. Phew, it was one of those moments where you think to yourself "how did I get here?" Once I carried only the weight of my backpack and now I am that woman who truly has her hands full that I watched from the sidelines with a bit of amusement but mostly indifference."

Haha - Life! Grand isn't it?

Vocare

At 4pm last friday, the afternoon we were to leave on our trip to Vernon I sat down to have my first bite to eat since 9am that day. I'd arrived at work at 9:30am for my last class of the term expecting to leave a few hours later. Instead I stumpled out of the building at 3pm, delirious from not having eaten and totally frustrated. Due to a a stupid mistake entering final grades made by skimming and rushing I had created a whole lot of extra paper work for myself. Finally I left determining it could wait until we returned and took The Exploder into Crappy Tire for an oil change. This is when I arrived at "The Cup" and read my weekly horoscope in The Pique.


Now there was some advice that was worth following. I'dbeen thinking of our jaunt to Vernon as a trip and a visit with Paul's side of the family but it hadn't occured to me that it might be a vacation. Vacation, from the Latin "vocare" - to empty - or in English to vacate, was actually what it was - a vacation from our lives and an emptying of any building tension. Paul had also been extremely busy dealing with footage, editing and all kinds of things and was staying up late nights to get it done. If you'd asked me if I was stressed I'd have said I was busy and felt a bit burned out, but not stressed. HOWEVER, I was waking up with a headache everyday and my teeth actually hurt from clenching them so bad in my sleep! I actually bought a mouth-guard but thanks to our little vacation, I haven't had to use it yet. The clenching problem went away as soon as we got to Vernon and there was nothing, NOTHING that had to get done! Ahhh, sweet relaxation...


We arrived a little after 2am on Saturday snuck into Edie and Howard's new downstairs suite and resettled the little ones. Poor Halle was at the end of her rope being in her carseat. Anneka was up at 6 wanting to see Grandma and Halle was awake then too. We kept her busy until 7, then Halle, Paul and I slept in until almost 11. That day, the girls slept a lot (Anneka took a three hour nap) and we rested. Overall we caught up on sleep and rest, ate delicious food prepared by Edie, Howard and Kim, went to the lake and got to hang out with Graham for the first time in three years. It was a very fun visit - what a great and talented family! Here our some pictures from our Vernon Vacation.

I am looking forward to devoting the rest of the summer to summery things and spending even more time with Halle and Anneka. It surprised me how much even teach two classes divided my time.