Today has been a low mood day which I tried to fight off all day but it just wouldn't go away - impatient, sleepy, irritable, grumpy. So I'm now sitting and unwinding with a glass of red wine.
Winter has hit in full force - blink and you missed fall. Anneka commented at the park the other day, that half the park was fall and half was winter. On and under the big deciduous trees were all the brightly covered leaves and in the open was fresh snow. Quite beautiful.
Yesterday was November 23 and I had my first ski day of the season with Charlotte. We had a great day - lots of conversation, great turns and a little hiking. My body felt good and quite strong even in the heavy snow. However, I think the constant desire to nap today is a result of the physical activity.
Very slowly I've been working on a psychology course (finally I'm half done) which has been quite interesting. I also have built a small tutoring cliental. My students so far are all middle school aged needing help with English/Language Arts - I am remembering how much I enjoy this age group. I've selected novels for all of them to work with and it has been a pleasure reading these stories with them.
I also took on a new pursuit last weekend. I've had a few people mention to me over the years that they thought I would be good as a maternity doctor or midwife. In fact, during my undergrad I made sure I obtained the prerequisites for both and volunteered at a veterinary hospital. My windy career path never turned in that direction and, still, I have other academic and career pursuits in mind. But, with the high proportion of pregnant women and young growing families in this community it occurred to me that serving pregnant women may be a welcome and rewarding service to offer in this community. I jumped into a birth doula course at Douglas College which was a lot more fun and well facilitated than I thought it might be. In retrospect I would certainly have had a doula when I had Anneka. I'm pretty busy but I think I will attend some of the Healthy Pregnancy Outreach meetings and volunteer my services.
I have applied for a M.Ed. program through UBC - Measurement, Evaluation and Research Methodology and am just waiting on my referees to send their paperwork. Yikes! It took me a long time to decide which program to do. This one is what it says - a lot of research methodology, a lot of statistics. As I said, Yikes! So why this one, I ask myself? Well, I could be up to date on all the latest research in any area of education or health I want to - how fun. I could evaluate courses/programs/assessments. I can design and carry out all kinds of research. I could devise ways to evaluate Adult Education programs, early education programs such as Montessori or Waldorf or studies into childbirth. What a way to contribute to areas of interest! This is what I hope, any way. I've applied for the M.Ed. option but am considering doing a thesis to receive an M.A. instead. Fingers crossed I get in!
OK...the kids! Yikes. They can be so sweet, polite, kind and loving and they can both be little hellions!!! Halle can be so destructive. She certainly has caught the "terrible twos" - part of the problem, I think, is she has access to a lot of toys that are not age appropriate. Like the felt pens with which she drew all over the floor; like the beautiful story cards with which she thought it would be fun to practice folding in half. If she gets a felt in her hands she draws on her body, paints likewise. She insists on doing everything herself which often ends up in disaster and if she isn't allowed she arches her back (I have to catch her so she doesn't smash her head on the floor) and shrieks! I honestly don't think Anneka was such a menace. She is full of energy and a lot of fun and also very funny - as Anneka was. Anneka, on the other hand, can just be rather ornery, stubborn and defiant. I tend to be pretty mellow in my reaction to all of this (with the occasional exception and then they just no it's gone to far). I try not to make it about me and try to phrase things like "it's not OK for you to treat people like this. Still they are both mush-buckets and smother me with kisses - Anneka likes to come up with new ways to tell me she loves me such as "I love you more than all the smiles in the world" or "I love you more than all the warm blankets on a winter day"! I think she's quite poetic! We get ridiculously mushy together!
I actually love that my girls have spunk, even though today I would have liked to have....oh never mind!
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Back on the Blog
It's been three months since my last confession...er, I mean post.
That's too much time to cover. I'll just say, I've been busy with work - working at being a mum to Halle and Anneka. It was an adjustment returning to full-time parenting during which, I must confess, I sometimes felt quite blue; however, it has been a special time with the girls this summer. Who wouldn't feel a little blue with the July we had? The latter part August and September have been spectacular and filled with outdoor time particularly at a beautiful bay just south of here...shhhh...it's a secret. I've been fairly active running and hiking and am feeling quite fit - well the last week I have let that slide and here I am tonight eating chocolate and drinking beer.
I feel close and connected to the girls and am happy with how they are developing. Namely, they are joyous, inquisitive, active and creative. They socialize, play hard and are healthy. What more is there at a year and a half and just four? I am happy that I have the time to pack picnics and get down on the floor or on the beach and play. I am also happy that I don't always have to do this and I can leave them to their own devices in their room or in the yard. I am thankful that the days of night time feedings are well in the past and I have my health and the energy to do this. (Halle was really a dream baby in retrospect - I was able to be so busy during her first year and didn't have to implement any sort of sleep training program - how lucky to experience this)
Although the summer weather was short, I am also glad that fall is underway and that we have now have a weekly schedule. Anneka is back at Cedar Valley Waldorf preschool Monday and Tuesday mornings. This is not a lot of time, and although she is loving it and could certainly cope well with a lot more time, it isn't necessary. I'm here; I can provide activities and plan play dates. Soon enough, she will be in kindergarten. Halle and Anneka are scheduled in gym programs and music which start next week. Come the winter Anneka will begin ski school on Sundays, during which I will either nordic ski with Hal, or switch baby duty with C and ski myself. It is satisfying to look at the calendar and see it all laid out.
A funny, sweet anecdote. Anneka has been playing "boyfriend and girlfriend" with a little boy in her preschool. I think they played the game a couple of times at the end of the school year last year. She says he asked her! I don't even think she knew what it means, and I'm not sure she does now, although she may be beginning to figure it out. This year there are 3 boys and 2 girls - very little class. Last year was girl - dominated 5:3 and there was not as much intermingling. It sounds like the little group this year has been having a lot of fun playing all together. She told me this evening (I had barely seen her all day as her school went on a field trip and then she had a playdate) that yesterday at school they played the game a little differently. Just her and her little friend played. She said she had been waiting for him to ask her all morning to play "boyfriend and girlfriend" and then he did! Funny she was waiting because she is not reluctant to offer an idea up to her friends, but I guess she wanted to be asked? Hmmm, that's interesting. When asked how they play that game she said they just hold hands and go places. I asked where, and she told me just places like the basket of bean bags. I remember preschool and how I really liked to play with certain boys. I wouldn't really call them crushes but it did seem like a bit more of a special event then inviting a girlfriend over. I don't recall using the terms boyfriend and girlfriend and holding hands, but it is kind of cute in it innocence. I love how candid she is and how she shares all sorts of details. Maybe if I always remain non-reactive, if I discuss rather than dictate, if I question rather than scold, if I respect rather than demand respect, if I learn rather than teach, she will continue to share with me as the years go on. Maybe I am overly naive or optimistic to think this is possible but I am hopeful. I hope the same of Halle and I wonder how our relationship will unfold. Yes, this time with these beautiful souls is not always easy, is not always fun, but I hope it is building a strong beginning.
It is nice to have the time to just watch and follow their lead. It would be great to be simultaneously taking a course in child development and have others to discuss with. Ah well....and life goes on.
That's too much time to cover. I'll just say, I've been busy with work - working at being a mum to Halle and Anneka. It was an adjustment returning to full-time parenting during which, I must confess, I sometimes felt quite blue; however, it has been a special time with the girls this summer. Who wouldn't feel a little blue with the July we had? The latter part August and September have been spectacular and filled with outdoor time particularly at a beautiful bay just south of here...shhhh...it's a secret. I've been fairly active running and hiking and am feeling quite fit - well the last week I have let that slide and here I am tonight eating chocolate and drinking beer.
I feel close and connected to the girls and am happy with how they are developing. Namely, they are joyous, inquisitive, active and creative. They socialize, play hard and are healthy. What more is there at a year and a half and just four? I am happy that I have the time to pack picnics and get down on the floor or on the beach and play. I am also happy that I don't always have to do this and I can leave them to their own devices in their room or in the yard. I am thankful that the days of night time feedings are well in the past and I have my health and the energy to do this. (Halle was really a dream baby in retrospect - I was able to be so busy during her first year and didn't have to implement any sort of sleep training program - how lucky to experience this)
Although the summer weather was short, I am also glad that fall is underway and that we have now have a weekly schedule. Anneka is back at Cedar Valley Waldorf preschool Monday and Tuesday mornings. This is not a lot of time, and although she is loving it and could certainly cope well with a lot more time, it isn't necessary. I'm here; I can provide activities and plan play dates. Soon enough, she will be in kindergarten. Halle and Anneka are scheduled in gym programs and music which start next week. Come the winter Anneka will begin ski school on Sundays, during which I will either nordic ski with Hal, or switch baby duty with C and ski myself. It is satisfying to look at the calendar and see it all laid out.
A funny, sweet anecdote. Anneka has been playing "boyfriend and girlfriend" with a little boy in her preschool. I think they played the game a couple of times at the end of the school year last year. She says he asked her! I don't even think she knew what it means, and I'm not sure she does now, although she may be beginning to figure it out. This year there are 3 boys and 2 girls - very little class. Last year was girl - dominated 5:3 and there was not as much intermingling. It sounds like the little group this year has been having a lot of fun playing all together. She told me this evening (I had barely seen her all day as her school went on a field trip and then she had a playdate) that yesterday at school they played the game a little differently. Just her and her little friend played. She said she had been waiting for him to ask her all morning to play "boyfriend and girlfriend" and then he did! Funny she was waiting because she is not reluctant to offer an idea up to her friends, but I guess she wanted to be asked? Hmmm, that's interesting. When asked how they play that game she said they just hold hands and go places. I asked where, and she told me just places like the basket of bean bags. I remember preschool and how I really liked to play with certain boys. I wouldn't really call them crushes but it did seem like a bit more of a special event then inviting a girlfriend over. I don't recall using the terms boyfriend and girlfriend and holding hands, but it is kind of cute in it innocence. I love how candid she is and how she shares all sorts of details. Maybe if I always remain non-reactive, if I discuss rather than dictate, if I question rather than scold, if I respect rather than demand respect, if I learn rather than teach, she will continue to share with me as the years go on. Maybe I am overly naive or optimistic to think this is possible but I am hopeful. I hope the same of Halle and I wonder how our relationship will unfold. Yes, this time with these beautiful souls is not always easy, is not always fun, but I hope it is building a strong beginning.
It is nice to have the time to just watch and follow their lead. It would be great to be simultaneously taking a course in child development and have others to discuss with. Ah well....and life goes on.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Anneka and Halle
Overdue for an update.
Current life is pretty steady and unfettered. The girls are growing and learning and we are both home with them. Paul is working against deadlines in the man-cave downstairs but summer also lends itself to visitors and celebrations which also must be fit in. On top of that, without work (I've been very part time and my last day is tomorrow) I don't have as much mental stimulus and I find I need a break from parenting more frequently).
Anneka is sick - it's rare for her so I really feel for her when she is. Still, she is a trooper. Her voice is very smokey right now, she would make a great lounge singer! Halle is better and is full of energy today. She is good for about an hour in the house in the morning and then needs to be set free or she gets irritable. Anneka on the other hand can stay indoors for hours working on "projects" and playing make-believe games. I'm a bit more like Halle in this way and so I find our day goes best when we get out early, come back for lunch, nap Halle (2 - 3 hours) and then Anneka and I can get into something and I can clean up from the morning. Basically at around 9 I open the door and off goes Halle bee-lining it out the gate and we follow. She continues to be very active and excitable. She is pretty loud also and her number of words, although still fairly unclear, is growing exponentially.
Anneka remains her social, inquisitive self. Her ability to start and hold a conversation with just about anyone - young, old, male, female - is impressive. She will talk to anyone and always has something to say. Her and Paul often lie in bed at night talking until way past her bedtime. She asks questions and he explains all kinds of things.
I've applied for a couple of interesting jobs and I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I am still loving Squamish (when the sun shines which is rare these days) and am looking forward to all the music festivals starting this weekend. There is no point in making plans until Paul finishes up this film. He has taken our visitors and the kids to Vancouver today and I am heading out for a run and then some gardening. I adjusted to a new baby very quickly this time, mentally and emotionally, and when I look back over the first year sleep deprivation is hardly even a memory. We were very lucky that way this time. However, physically it has taken me a lot longer to recover. Finally, I am into my last five pounds to get back to a range I feel good in. After having Halle, I was the heaviest I've every been by far for a good year. I can do a forearm stand again and no longer dread running. Here we go!
Current life is pretty steady and unfettered. The girls are growing and learning and we are both home with them. Paul is working against deadlines in the man-cave downstairs but summer also lends itself to visitors and celebrations which also must be fit in. On top of that, without work (I've been very part time and my last day is tomorrow) I don't have as much mental stimulus and I find I need a break from parenting more frequently).
Anneka is sick - it's rare for her so I really feel for her when she is. Still, she is a trooper. Her voice is very smokey right now, she would make a great lounge singer! Halle is better and is full of energy today. She is good for about an hour in the house in the morning and then needs to be set free or she gets irritable. Anneka on the other hand can stay indoors for hours working on "projects" and playing make-believe games. I'm a bit more like Halle in this way and so I find our day goes best when we get out early, come back for lunch, nap Halle (2 - 3 hours) and then Anneka and I can get into something and I can clean up from the morning. Basically at around 9 I open the door and off goes Halle bee-lining it out the gate and we follow. She continues to be very active and excitable. She is pretty loud also and her number of words, although still fairly unclear, is growing exponentially.
Anneka remains her social, inquisitive self. Her ability to start and hold a conversation with just about anyone - young, old, male, female - is impressive. She will talk to anyone and always has something to say. Her and Paul often lie in bed at night talking until way past her bedtime. She asks questions and he explains all kinds of things.
I've applied for a couple of interesting jobs and I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I am still loving Squamish (when the sun shines which is rare these days) and am looking forward to all the music festivals starting this weekend. There is no point in making plans until Paul finishes up this film. He has taken our visitors and the kids to Vancouver today and I am heading out for a run and then some gardening. I adjusted to a new baby very quickly this time, mentally and emotionally, and when I look back over the first year sleep deprivation is hardly even a memory. We were very lucky that way this time. However, physically it has taken me a lot longer to recover. Finally, I am into my last five pounds to get back to a range I feel good in. After having Halle, I was the heaviest I've every been by far for a good year. I can do a forearm stand again and no longer dread running. Here we go!
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
My Domicile
I chose the name of this blog to encapsulate all facets of my life that are serving to bring me 'home' or to the place that I reside. By reside I don't mean in time and space although this dwelling and this community I live in are facilitating the process. The title is broad enough to focus on family, community, work, anything I am involved in that is both grounding me and feeding the fire.
Up until now I have mostly been a sampler of culture, a cultural spectator and soaker-upper and a learner. Never before have I wanted in such a way to be a creator of culture, or a contributor to culture. I want for this town, I want for the people here and it feels good. I want for our common vision and direction and for the betterment of our most marginalized. Less and less do I want to go away and contribute; more and more I want to stay and contribute. This is my community; it is the community of my children and hopefully they will learn from it and contribute to it by simply being allowed to be their beautiful selves.
Monday, May 9, 2011
Collectively Called Halleka
Was just surprised by Paul. They have called it quits and will be home tomorrow! Anneka has been really missing him and will be stoked. I am fully back in my groove today so would be fine with another week or so but it will be great to see him. He is going to be very busy though and I hope all the editing goes smoothly!
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Holy Guacamole! What a Ride!
The week following the release of the disappointing news that our program and department area was being drastically (and immediately) cut has unraveled as a sequence of unplanned and emotionally demanding events.
Actively pursuing any task or partaking in all events that could help to prevent or diminish this unwanted prospect became my main focus and at the end of it all I find myself with a sore throat, stomach pains (which have thankfully subsided) and fairly substantial fatigue (the fatigue that comes with fighting an illness). It reminds me of exam period in university where inevitably I'd wind up sick after all those late nights of cramming - but only after the last exam had been written.
I'm done though; I'm done with it. There has been a good show of student support with many letters written and it is not over, but I have taken myself out of it. As a temporary employee I've done all I feel I should do without jeopardizing my position; I can now grieve! It really feels like grief. At a meeting with senior Administration on Friday people mentioned how they have been losing sleep over all this and I mentioned that was one thing I was grateful for - maintaining my sleep. Murphy's Law that night I awoke in the night replaying events and conversation and was awake for a couple of hours. Last night I slept all night but it felt more light with thoughts and dreams still gravitating toward this event.
Plans for last week were to drive to Vernon with the girls and have a relaxing time with Grandma. We did have a nice time and it was relaxing the two days I was there but I ended up leaving the girls there, driving back for a night and a day of meetings and returning to Vernon the following night. However I think it was really special for the girls to spend so much quality time with their Grandma. We got back (again) from Vernon on Thursday and on Friday Auntie Char saved my butt by coming up so I could wrap up all lose ends at work. (Picnicking in the sun by the Lillooet gas station, the girls stained orange from popsicles, I felt like turning the car south; if only we were completely free and I'd had our passports.)
Plans for tomorrow were to start full time work for the first summer term. It was going to be intense but I was ready; everything was ready. It wasn't my first choice to work full time but it seemed too good an opportunity to turn down. So, in a way this is good; it just takes some time to transition to. With no work, I can no longer justify paying for childcare which has meant no Gretel - so sad. Thankfully she has another job. I was nervous about going from a working mum back to a full time mom, but I've found it's just like riding a bike. Despite not being in top form my house is already cleaner if not tidier and the girls are being great.
One thing about all the action is it has made these first three weeks of Paul being away whiz by. Only two to go but now that life is slowing down so will the time. Actually, it's not that life is slowing down (particularly for the kids whose rhythm and routine has never changed) but that it won't be as varied for me. When I come home from work and Paul is away it is just me and the kids. I am so happy to hang out with them. A colleague who was expecting his first baby asked me how I managed to maintain patience and remain engaged with the kids after a day of work and I said something that at the time probably seemed to make no sense, or rather state the obvious, and that was that being with my kids was like coming home for me. What I think I meant is that they centered me or connected me with my simple self. Luckily for me I had a job that (most of the time) energized me event though it might sometimes tire me out. So being with them after work made me feel warm and cozy inside and after they have been fed and bathed we'd hang out on my bed and play and read.
I always invite Anneka into our bed when Paul is gone and love having them both nearby. This past week Halle has also been waking up in the night and when she wakes I always nurse her. And when they are in the same room they seem to get up earlier for the day - always before seven. Last night my needs switched. After being with them so much I recently instead of wanting them close I wanted my space. This little crib of Halle's is so awesome. I wheeled it into Anneka's room and put them to sleep in there. I didn't hear a peep from them all night and they slept until 6:45. Then I wheeled it back into my room today to make space in A's little room (which is slowly becoming H and A's room). It is back there again tonight. Halle seems excited about this until she's actually put in her crib. It is probably difficult to reconcile not having the cuddly nursing session in the dark before being put down. I'll take a chair in next time and try to replicate this.
And here we are. The whole summer before us with no plans and endless possibilities. Let the sun shine and the adventures begin!!
Actively pursuing any task or partaking in all events that could help to prevent or diminish this unwanted prospect became my main focus and at the end of it all I find myself with a sore throat, stomach pains (which have thankfully subsided) and fairly substantial fatigue (the fatigue that comes with fighting an illness). It reminds me of exam period in university where inevitably I'd wind up sick after all those late nights of cramming - but only after the last exam had been written.
I'm done though; I'm done with it. There has been a good show of student support with many letters written and it is not over, but I have taken myself out of it. As a temporary employee I've done all I feel I should do without jeopardizing my position; I can now grieve! It really feels like grief. At a meeting with senior Administration on Friday people mentioned how they have been losing sleep over all this and I mentioned that was one thing I was grateful for - maintaining my sleep. Murphy's Law that night I awoke in the night replaying events and conversation and was awake for a couple of hours. Last night I slept all night but it felt more light with thoughts and dreams still gravitating toward this event.
Plans for last week were to drive to Vernon with the girls and have a relaxing time with Grandma. We did have a nice time and it was relaxing the two days I was there but I ended up leaving the girls there, driving back for a night and a day of meetings and returning to Vernon the following night. However I think it was really special for the girls to spend so much quality time with their Grandma. We got back (again) from Vernon on Thursday and on Friday Auntie Char saved my butt by coming up so I could wrap up all lose ends at work. (Picnicking in the sun by the Lillooet gas station, the girls stained orange from popsicles, I felt like turning the car south; if only we were completely free and I'd had our passports.)
Plans for tomorrow were to start full time work for the first summer term. It was going to be intense but I was ready; everything was ready. It wasn't my first choice to work full time but it seemed too good an opportunity to turn down. So, in a way this is good; it just takes some time to transition to. With no work, I can no longer justify paying for childcare which has meant no Gretel - so sad. Thankfully she has another job. I was nervous about going from a working mum back to a full time mom, but I've found it's just like riding a bike. Despite not being in top form my house is already cleaner if not tidier and the girls are being great.
One thing about all the action is it has made these first three weeks of Paul being away whiz by. Only two to go but now that life is slowing down so will the time. Actually, it's not that life is slowing down (particularly for the kids whose rhythm and routine has never changed) but that it won't be as varied for me. When I come home from work and Paul is away it is just me and the kids. I am so happy to hang out with them. A colleague who was expecting his first baby asked me how I managed to maintain patience and remain engaged with the kids after a day of work and I said something that at the time probably seemed to make no sense, or rather state the obvious, and that was that being with my kids was like coming home for me. What I think I meant is that they centered me or connected me with my simple self. Luckily for me I had a job that (most of the time) energized me event though it might sometimes tire me out. So being with them after work made me feel warm and cozy inside and after they have been fed and bathed we'd hang out on my bed and play and read.
I always invite Anneka into our bed when Paul is gone and love having them both nearby. This past week Halle has also been waking up in the night and when she wakes I always nurse her. And when they are in the same room they seem to get up earlier for the day - always before seven. Last night my needs switched. After being with them so much I recently instead of wanting them close I wanted my space. This little crib of Halle's is so awesome. I wheeled it into Anneka's room and put them to sleep in there. I didn't hear a peep from them all night and they slept until 6:45. Then I wheeled it back into my room today to make space in A's little room (which is slowly becoming H and A's room). It is back there again tonight. Halle seems excited about this until she's actually put in her crib. It is probably difficult to reconcile not having the cuddly nursing session in the dark before being put down. I'll take a chair in next time and try to replicate this.
And here we are. The whole summer before us with no plans and endless possibilities. Let the sun shine and the adventures begin!!
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Stifling Education One Parabola at a Time
Life is a strange twisting tale. Just when you think you have the table beautifully set, the cutlery perfectly aligned for a multi-course meal, the wine glasses sparkling just waiting for the guests to arrive to share in a nourishing meal in which you all have made a contribution an unannounced guest can appear and without anyone noticing the subtle flip of a practiced wrist can snatch the table cloth out from under the whole display and 'poof' - it all disappears.
That is exactly what has happened in my world of work and my world of home and family. In a nutshell I will likely not be doing the job I love in the community I love with the people I respect this summer.
There is a romantic element to effectively being on one's own with two young children. I feel more than ever a sense of duty; of grave responsibility; of fierce maternalism. At all times, I must be the grown up. I must solve problems and until I am able to solve them, or make sense of them, I must continue to do what needs to be done for the girls - to smile and laugh and share in their innocence and belief that everything in the world is good and kind and that there will always be someone to take care of them.
In times of need or perceived need it is always the disadvantaged, the most marginalized that suffer the most. It is another small blow to education.
That is exactly what has happened in my world of work and my world of home and family. In a nutshell I will likely not be doing the job I love in the community I love with the people I respect this summer.
There is a romantic element to effectively being on one's own with two young children. I feel more than ever a sense of duty; of grave responsibility; of fierce maternalism. At all times, I must be the grown up. I must solve problems and until I am able to solve them, or make sense of them, I must continue to do what needs to be done for the girls - to smile and laugh and share in their innocence and belief that everything in the world is good and kind and that there will always be someone to take care of them.
In times of need or perceived need it is always the disadvantaged, the most marginalized that suffer the most. It is another small blow to education.
Friday, April 15, 2011
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Picture Review
Although there is a 5M base at the Whistler Nordic site and you can still ski all the way down to the Village base, winter is coming to an end.
I think Paul has had an incredible (if exhausting) winter and will continue with his winter adventure as he heads to Kamchatka then the coast of Norway for a month or more. It is a pretty exciting life he is leading; however I know it is hard for him to be away from home for that long.
The girls and I have got to enjoy winter too. Anneka has had five days on her skis and Halle has had one day of downhill skiing. One weekend we took both girls up to Whistler mid-station and skied with them on the magic carpet. It was a heavy snowfall day. Anneka did seven laps with Paul and I did five with Halle between my legs. She was intrigued. She did not want to be held on the magic carpet; she crawled on it and stuck her hands off the edge to scoop up snow. It was a great introduction. Then I stuck her in our all terrain stroller and skied with it back down to the Gondola!
Anneka has done really well with the skiing - on the last day with Paul she was getting the feel for turning by leaning. Her skis are a bit long for her to snowplow turn just yet, but should be great for her next year. She has enjoyed it and that is the most important thing. Both Paul and I have tried to make it fun without pushing her.
I have really enjoyed the endurance aspect of cross country skiing this year. I got in less days than I would have liked (7 in total) but two days alone on skate skis which I think is my preference. The stroke is similar to figure skating so it feels natural to me and it is a great work out. I've had four days downhill - last night Paul and I stayed in Whistler without the kids. We sent out for a late dinner, then skied today. I really enjoyed our alone time and it was fun to ski with my man again!
Our nanny, Gretel has worked out better than we could have hoped. Gretel is an incredibly likeable person; a natural winner who seems to excel in all areas. She is a trained nurse, has exceptional interpersonal skills and seems to have a natural understanding of how best to interact with these young kids in many contexts. She is also intelligent and investigates stages of development, ways of managing behaviour and comes with ideas and plans for the day. In my opinion Anneka and Halle have thrived in her care and I am very glad she will be with us for a while longer. (Sometimes, Gretel, you make me feel inadequate :). http://margarethafortmann.blogspot.com/
Spring and Summer are just around the corner and I know we are going to have so much fun. It is very nice for Halle that she will be so mobile this summer. She is getting very quick on her feet - practically running. Between Gretel, myself and lessons (Gretel's boyfriend is their swim "coach") the girls have been spending quite a bit of time at the pool. Halle is quite comfortable in the water but not so much with her coach (it's because he's a he, I'm sure)! She has very little fear of physical stuff but can be scared by some odd things like men (not so strange really), insects, frogs, practically everything in the aquarium except the small colourful tropical fish and jellyfish which she loves. Women she also seems to love and walks up to my friends for hugs. The men thing is not ubiquitous especially with those she is familiar with and will lessen with time...and she absolutely loves her daddy! She remains a very social little thing despite these fears and a certain shyness.
Anneka is the opposite with the swimming thing - although she is not as naturally comfortable in the water (she is really coming along though) she has no problem with her. Actually she seems at ease in most situations and seems to make friends easily. The girls really enjoy eachother although there are occasional spats. I am sure they will continue - I suspect both are rather tenacious and sensitive. Overall Anneka is really good about sharing her toys and is vigilant about looking after Halle, but she does get upset, understandably, when Halle wrecks her stuff!
Here are a lot of pictures from the last couple of months.
Halle is almost one. She figures out how to reach the counter.
Biking on our street on a sunny winter day.
Anneka becomes a prolific artiste.
Winne-the-Pooh floating up to the beehive with his red balloon. "The bees are angry".
Lady with a big dress and nostrils.
1. Gretel in Australia and Anneka in Canada
2. Hear patterns and a heart rug
3. Fancy Letters - also a day she started printing complete mirror image (good thing that stopped!)
4. A recent one I find amusing. "Sunny Luna and the Crazy Men"
(Gretel with Halle - she usually likes to be held by Gretel!)
xoxox these girls!
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Not a Princess
...despite the self indulgent post of yesterday. I know when I'm being melodramatic. Really, things are good. Today there was sun, which may account for my change of heart.
A nice bike ride, some fresh air and a couple of reminders of how lucky I am have given me a little perspective. I have two healthy, happy little kids, a wonderful nanny for them, a good job, a good relationship and a comfortable place to live. When the clouds lift, I can see I am surrounded by beauty.
I slept alone again last night, soundly, deeply, and Halle slept straight through the night. Paul left dark and early for Ogre and has just returned, more than 14 hours later: exhausted.
Admittedly today I tried to find someone for Anneka to play with - preferably at their house. I called around, but the reality is I'm not the only one around here who has a partner who works on the weekend, or who has to work. I kinda did a mass babysitting gig (6 kids including mine) last Wednesday and was crossing my fingers for a return on the investment today! Nope, not happening. I had hoped to go for a ski and didn't really want to drag Anneka along. She'd much rather play with a friend.
OK, I thought. It's us again and we are going to have a great day. We did. A great day. It was nothing too special, the usual food prep, art activities, nap time and time outside. This morning while Hal slept, I set up my bike with the chariot and the bike seat and packed a lunch. We went for a beautiful ride. Anneka and I chatted the whole way. When she is in the chariot she is hard to hear and she shouts at me and we have strained conversation or I try to ignore her! The bike seat is perfect. Talking with Anneka is really very enjoyable, especially when she is in such a great mood. Halle is a great chariot kid. She chills out, hums away and enjoys the ride. I think she likes having more space back there. We stopped for a play date with friends then rode some more.
This evening after bath we hung out on my bed as usual. The girls play naked on the bed. Tonight was extra fun. Anneka jumped around yammering about how her and Halle were kiwi birds and this is our nest that they made and how Halle made it out of clay and mud and she decorated it with flowers and how they sewed the pillows. Halle stood with her arms over her head then threw herself down over and over. I lay on my back and they climbed all over me, giving me big slobbery kisses and love bites and tickles. We giggled a lot.
It was smooth and fun. These are the moments that make memories. This time with my young children is so sweet and when they are grown I will wish for it back.
In the grand scheme, life is grande. It's moments are treasures; it's the in betweens that can get rough.
A nice bike ride, some fresh air and a couple of reminders of how lucky I am have given me a little perspective. I have two healthy, happy little kids, a wonderful nanny for them, a good job, a good relationship and a comfortable place to live. When the clouds lift, I can see I am surrounded by beauty.
I slept alone again last night, soundly, deeply, and Halle slept straight through the night. Paul left dark and early for Ogre and has just returned, more than 14 hours later: exhausted.
Admittedly today I tried to find someone for Anneka to play with - preferably at their house. I called around, but the reality is I'm not the only one around here who has a partner who works on the weekend, or who has to work. I kinda did a mass babysitting gig (6 kids including mine) last Wednesday and was crossing my fingers for a return on the investment today! Nope, not happening. I had hoped to go for a ski and didn't really want to drag Anneka along. She'd much rather play with a friend.
OK, I thought. It's us again and we are going to have a great day. We did. A great day. It was nothing too special, the usual food prep, art activities, nap time and time outside. This morning while Hal slept, I set up my bike with the chariot and the bike seat and packed a lunch. We went for a beautiful ride. Anneka and I chatted the whole way. When she is in the chariot she is hard to hear and she shouts at me and we have strained conversation or I try to ignore her! The bike seat is perfect. Talking with Anneka is really very enjoyable, especially when she is in such a great mood. Halle is a great chariot kid. She chills out, hums away and enjoys the ride. I think she likes having more space back there. We stopped for a play date with friends then rode some more.
This evening after bath we hung out on my bed as usual. The girls play naked on the bed. Tonight was extra fun. Anneka jumped around yammering about how her and Halle were kiwi birds and this is our nest that they made and how Halle made it out of clay and mud and she decorated it with flowers and how they sewed the pillows. Halle stood with her arms over her head then threw herself down over and over. I lay on my back and they climbed all over me, giving me big slobbery kisses and love bites and tickles. We giggled a lot.
It was smooth and fun. These are the moments that make memories. This time with my young children is so sweet and when they are grown I will wish for it back.
In the grand scheme, life is grande. It's moments are treasures; it's the in betweens that can get rough.
Saturday, March 5, 2011
The Girlz are Alright.
Anneka: The Storyteller.
She is drawing amazing pictures ripe with stories and imagery: staircases, animals, patterns, symbols (diamonds, hearts, peace signs), people, pregnant mummies, queens, princesses, beds, apple trees and coat hangers. And details, details, details. She prints her name without asking any of the letters, she asks how to spell all kinds of words and writes them down in her neat printing. She makes decorative letters, and is beginning to print some lower case letters too - mummy letters and baby letters. She can identify and print all the letters and her phonological awareness is beginning to develop. She runs her finger under words and breaks up the sounds after she has printed the word. She says she's doing her homework. Today we made a weekly calendar and drew pictures for school days, work days, home days etc. Anneka has been trying to get it all straight so maybe this will help.
Halle: The Performer
Halle is busy. She's busy starting 'programs': doing laundry, playing tea party, baking cakes; anything she watches us doing, she copies and initiates. She drags her laundry basket out of the bedroom into the kitchen, picks up Anneka's dirty clothes and tosses them in there. Then she tips it over and takes them back out. She walks over to the book shelves, looks through the books, pulls out the ones she wants, sits down and "reads" them, and then brings me or Anneka the ones she wants us to read. She puts the dishes in the dishwasher. She feed herself with hand or spoons. She, and only she, feeds herself. She gets her clothes out of her drawer and tries to put them on. She puts things in cupboards and drawers. I find things in the strangest places. And she dances. She really dances hard. She pumps at the air with her hand or fist, waggles her head, moves her feet, shoulders and hips. It's awesome. She's a girl after my own heart.
They both are.
Emily: The Dreamer
I dream of change. A change would do me good. Maybe its the time of year but over the past couple of weeks I've felt myself become quite blue. A month ago I was excited by everything but now I feel like Pooh-bear. Ho hum, hum drum. Life feels like work, parenting, housework, sleep, work, parenting, housework, sleep, housework, parenting, work sleep with no end in sight.
Of course I enjoy my kids, I still enjoy my work (well my students anyway), and I like to organize but I don't like housework. Nothing's changed. I don't like housework because with kids it is just continuous maintenance. Nothing new. I've been complaining a lot this past week because it's relentless. It seems that for the past while Paul has never had a day off filming that I am not working. G is with the girls during my work time. What that means for me is I am either working or parenting, and when it's done I sleep. Of course there is overlap between Paul and me for a few hours some evenings. During these times I find myself retreating...not even asking just disappearing to some corner of the house, or spending longer than I have to nursing Halle before putting her down, just so I don't have to go clean up the kitchen or tidy up the house. I also find myself retreating within more. Often when I'm not content, I get fiery, I fire up and make a change or demand one. This time it's more of a numbing feeling. I'm feel resigned. Not to worry - it is short lived. I will never live my life this way for long.
The thing I was looking forward slipped away (Costa Rica in July) and so I've taken work instead for both summer terms. Without this reward, this carrot it's harder to find motivation. I had also intended work on a graduate program in September. The M.Ed online program I had my sights on is convenient, fairly interesting, but does not really inspire me. So at the 11th hours - actually the 13th - I changed my mind. I've missed the deadlines for other programs and will have to postpone. I definitely want to do a master's that is more academic, more research based, more applicable to my work and so will apply for a M.Ed or M.A. in Curriculum Foundations at SFU and Curriculum and Pedagogy at UBC. The UBC program has a wider selection of courses delving more into the philosophies and the influence of social norms and paradigms on learning and teaching and pedagogy which all excite me, but the SFU program may be better adapted for a working mom. Doing a program with so much f2f and on-campus time will be challenging from Squamish so perhaps it's better I wait another year when the kids are older. I'm disappointed.
I will have to find something to get excited about. I'm sure I won't have a problem getting accepted but in the meantime to help keep me excited about life I may take some courses. Maybe Mandarin or brush up on some human biology courses (it would improve my teaching as well), definitely some more yoga workshops and maybe even work toward my instructor's certification. That I would enjoy.
At the Art Gallery today we saw some female Japanese drummers perform. It was wicked. Huge drums pounding from a prone position. I think that there is nothing I would rather do than that. I am like a shaken carbonated beverage sitting on the shelf. I need to be pointed in the right direction and then cracked open. I need to beat some drums. Maybe, to Paul's dismay I'll join a drumming circle!
One more thing. Last night I sighed and said "I guess I'll night wean Halle tonight. I better go to bed early". Halle still wakes and nurses sometimes frequently, sometimes not. Because I work quite a bit, I haven't really wanted to cut it out entirely. But now I'm feeling more ready. Most days I'm fine, but after nights of more frequent nursing I am tired. I have too much responsibility to be sleep deprived. So Paul (as I was hoping) suggested I sleep downstairs at least for part of the night. Hmmm....how nice to lie in bed and actually read a book with the bedside light on. I was asleep no later than 9:30, got up once to pee in the night and then was awoken by Paul at 6:30. Apparently, Halle (who now has a very nice "condo sized" crib in our room) had woken a few times, he did not respond at all, and she went back to sleep quickly. He thinks she realized I wasn't there. So it was a non-event last night. Maybe I'll ask if we can do it again tonight. I don't know if I'm ready to give it up all together though. What about the days I am out the door before she even wakes up. I guess I'll go to her and drain myself before I leave - get up a 10 minutes earlier. When Anneka night weaned she never went back. Through teething, sickness or anything else she may have been experiencing, she slept. She was Halle's age.
She is drawing amazing pictures ripe with stories and imagery: staircases, animals, patterns, symbols (diamonds, hearts, peace signs), people, pregnant mummies, queens, princesses, beds, apple trees and coat hangers. And details, details, details. She prints her name without asking any of the letters, she asks how to spell all kinds of words and writes them down in her neat printing. She makes decorative letters, and is beginning to print some lower case letters too - mummy letters and baby letters. She can identify and print all the letters and her phonological awareness is beginning to develop. She runs her finger under words and breaks up the sounds after she has printed the word. She says she's doing her homework. Today we made a weekly calendar and drew pictures for school days, work days, home days etc. Anneka has been trying to get it all straight so maybe this will help.
Halle: The Performer
Halle is busy. She's busy starting 'programs': doing laundry, playing tea party, baking cakes; anything she watches us doing, she copies and initiates. She drags her laundry basket out of the bedroom into the kitchen, picks up Anneka's dirty clothes and tosses them in there. Then she tips it over and takes them back out. She walks over to the book shelves, looks through the books, pulls out the ones she wants, sits down and "reads" them, and then brings me or Anneka the ones she wants us to read. She puts the dishes in the dishwasher. She feed herself with hand or spoons. She, and only she, feeds herself. She gets her clothes out of her drawer and tries to put them on. She puts things in cupboards and drawers. I find things in the strangest places. And she dances. She really dances hard. She pumps at the air with her hand or fist, waggles her head, moves her feet, shoulders and hips. It's awesome. She's a girl after my own heart.
They both are.
Emily: The Dreamer
I dream of change. A change would do me good. Maybe its the time of year but over the past couple of weeks I've felt myself become quite blue. A month ago I was excited by everything but now I feel like Pooh-bear. Ho hum, hum drum. Life feels like work, parenting, housework, sleep, work, parenting, housework, sleep, housework, parenting, work sleep with no end in sight.
Of course I enjoy my kids, I still enjoy my work (well my students anyway), and I like to organize but I don't like housework. Nothing's changed. I don't like housework because with kids it is just continuous maintenance. Nothing new. I've been complaining a lot this past week because it's relentless. It seems that for the past while Paul has never had a day off filming that I am not working. G is with the girls during my work time. What that means for me is I am either working or parenting, and when it's done I sleep. Of course there is overlap between Paul and me for a few hours some evenings. During these times I find myself retreating...not even asking just disappearing to some corner of the house, or spending longer than I have to nursing Halle before putting her down, just so I don't have to go clean up the kitchen or tidy up the house. I also find myself retreating within more. Often when I'm not content, I get fiery, I fire up and make a change or demand one. This time it's more of a numbing feeling. I'm feel resigned. Not to worry - it is short lived. I will never live my life this way for long.
The thing I was looking forward slipped away (Costa Rica in July) and so I've taken work instead for both summer terms. Without this reward, this carrot it's harder to find motivation. I had also intended work on a graduate program in September. The M.Ed online program I had my sights on is convenient, fairly interesting, but does not really inspire me. So at the 11th hours - actually the 13th - I changed my mind. I've missed the deadlines for other programs and will have to postpone. I definitely want to do a master's that is more academic, more research based, more applicable to my work and so will apply for a M.Ed or M.A. in Curriculum Foundations at SFU and Curriculum and Pedagogy at UBC. The UBC program has a wider selection of courses delving more into the philosophies and the influence of social norms and paradigms on learning and teaching and pedagogy which all excite me, but the SFU program may be better adapted for a working mom. Doing a program with so much f2f and on-campus time will be challenging from Squamish so perhaps it's better I wait another year when the kids are older. I'm disappointed.
I will have to find something to get excited about. I'm sure I won't have a problem getting accepted but in the meantime to help keep me excited about life I may take some courses. Maybe Mandarin or brush up on some human biology courses (it would improve my teaching as well), definitely some more yoga workshops and maybe even work toward my instructor's certification. That I would enjoy.
At the Art Gallery today we saw some female Japanese drummers perform. It was wicked. Huge drums pounding from a prone position. I think that there is nothing I would rather do than that. I am like a shaken carbonated beverage sitting on the shelf. I need to be pointed in the right direction and then cracked open. I need to beat some drums. Maybe, to Paul's dismay I'll join a drumming circle!
One more thing. Last night I sighed and said "I guess I'll night wean Halle tonight. I better go to bed early". Halle still wakes and nurses sometimes frequently, sometimes not. Because I work quite a bit, I haven't really wanted to cut it out entirely. But now I'm feeling more ready. Most days I'm fine, but after nights of more frequent nursing I am tired. I have too much responsibility to be sleep deprived. So Paul (as I was hoping) suggested I sleep downstairs at least for part of the night. Hmmm....how nice to lie in bed and actually read a book with the bedside light on. I was asleep no later than 9:30, got up once to pee in the night and then was awoken by Paul at 6:30. Apparently, Halle (who now has a very nice "condo sized" crib in our room) had woken a few times, he did not respond at all, and she went back to sleep quickly. He thinks she realized I wasn't there. So it was a non-event last night. Maybe I'll ask if we can do it again tonight. I don't know if I'm ready to give it up all together though. What about the days I am out the door before she even wakes up. I guess I'll go to her and drain myself before I leave - get up a 10 minutes earlier. When Anneka night weaned she never went back. Through teething, sickness or anything else she may have been experiencing, she slept. She was Halle's age.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Snowflakes and Honey Days
Storm after storm keeps hitting the coast. Not too long ago a thought about cleaning up the yard drifted through my mind, but winter is by no means over. The girls have been hit by another cold. Anneka is ever hardy and it barely affects her, but it has really set into little Halle. Anneka spent time outdoors today building a Snow Queen and running through the "trails" Paul shoveled. Halle wistfully watched the snow fall from the window and sucked on her honey jar! She sipped honey lemon tea from a bottle and napped a lot. I played with Paul's new cameral, then I got away for a skate ski at Callaghan. It was a more mellow and restful week as both Anneka and my schools were closed for PD/reading break - quite enjoyable. I'm ready for a couple more months of school and a bit more winter too!
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Twice in One Day
Twice in one day I felt my stomach sink and my pulse speed up.
First the voice said it was Whistler Mountain calling. That was on my way home from work and my first thought was "Paul". But someone had found my sun glasses at the Nordic site. Actually good news.
Secondly a knock on the door just after I put the kids to bed. A young man stood on the porch with that sun/windburned face, glowing teeth and eyes and wild hair of someone just getting back from the mountains. "Hi Emily" - he had a European accent and seemed slightly awkward. My thought - "pro-snowboarder...haven't met ... bad news..Paul". And then that sinking feeling. Just G's boyfriend picking up her phone she left here.
I don't like it, I don't like it at all. But I hear the truck pull up outside. All's well. Another day. Mostly I've ceased to worry. It's been too many years. So many nights past 9pm, even 10. Once in Pemby got the search party together and were about to head out when the truck pulled up.
It bothers me when things happen in pairs; it feels like a warning to complete the trilogy. I guess I'm superstitious. P just got in and told me it was one of the gnarliest drives home he's had on the coast - had to pull over multiple times. Maybe that's all it was about.
What a terrible, morbid post.
Our family dog just passed on, and I've been feeling very sad. Maybe it's all about that.
On a positive note: it's puking and I might have a chance to ski the hill tomorrow if Paul doesn't film. Yes!
And on the rest of the home front, all is well. Yesterday I took an hour off work and attended a three year old Valentine's Day tea at Anneka's school. I had a great time and enjoyed watching Anneka shining brightly with excitement and pride. Halle is inquisitive and adventurous. She pushes chairs up to counters and climbs up on them. I caught her with my toothbrush at the bathroom sink this evening - too cute.
Sleep has been less than perfect. Hal's nursing a few times a night and it's starting to get to me. Anymore than twice and I really notice. I don't like that either. I like to be productive and energetic. I'm so much better at everything when I'm well rested and much more patient.
Maybe night wean soonish....
First the voice said it was Whistler Mountain calling. That was on my way home from work and my first thought was "Paul". But someone had found my sun glasses at the Nordic site. Actually good news.
Secondly a knock on the door just after I put the kids to bed. A young man stood on the porch with that sun/windburned face, glowing teeth and eyes and wild hair of someone just getting back from the mountains. "Hi Emily" - he had a European accent and seemed slightly awkward. My thought - "pro-snowboarder...haven't met ... bad news..Paul". And then that sinking feeling. Just G's boyfriend picking up her phone she left here.
I don't like it, I don't like it at all. But I hear the truck pull up outside. All's well. Another day. Mostly I've ceased to worry. It's been too many years. So many nights past 9pm, even 10. Once in Pemby got the search party together and were about to head out when the truck pulled up.
It bothers me when things happen in pairs; it feels like a warning to complete the trilogy. I guess I'm superstitious. P just got in and told me it was one of the gnarliest drives home he's had on the coast - had to pull over multiple times. Maybe that's all it was about.
What a terrible, morbid post.
Our family dog just passed on, and I've been feeling very sad. Maybe it's all about that.
On a positive note: it's puking and I might have a chance to ski the hill tomorrow if Paul doesn't film. Yes!
And on the rest of the home front, all is well. Yesterday I took an hour off work and attended a three year old Valentine's Day tea at Anneka's school. I had a great time and enjoyed watching Anneka shining brightly with excitement and pride. Halle is inquisitive and adventurous. She pushes chairs up to counters and climbs up on them. I caught her with my toothbrush at the bathroom sink this evening - too cute.
Sleep has been less than perfect. Hal's nursing a few times a night and it's starting to get to me. Anymore than twice and I really notice. I don't like that either. I like to be productive and energetic. I'm so much better at everything when I'm well rested and much more patient.
Maybe night wean soonish....
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
One Year Old You!
Halle
At one year old you are sick again with yet another very snotty cold
poor you
weepy red eyes, a little waif
your teeny nostrils in your teeny nose are very clogged
again.
At one year old you stand and groove
to Reggae beats,
without moving your feet,
much.
Hips rock, knees bounce, arms snake and head waggles
with a half grin on your face you feel the beats
and groove.
At one year old you can walk from Here to There
as long as There isn't too far away.
You are still growing into your walking legs
you waver but are getting
there
step
by
step.
At one year old you are telling stories
onomatopea gestures charades expressive
expression of likes and dislikes of feeling sudden anger
when what you want is taken away of feeling excitement
bubbling up through your entire little body bursting through at your nerve endings
your nadis aglow your spirit spilling forth lighting up your entire little being
sound expression chortles and squeals the final
culmination of this intense excitement
surprising us and
surprising
you.
At one year old you sit with a book on the floor under the lamp.
You hunch your back and shoulders and send your intention
with pleasure to the closed book
a hand on each side thumbs meeting in the middle and open the book
and look and exclaim
oh!
then close it thumbs meet a millimetre or two over and open the book
on a different page and exclaim
oh! Whoa!
Close Open Close Open, exclamations of pleasure
you entertain yourself in these ways
that are all you, all you, at one year old.
This poem has no end
there is no end of you, Halle, at one year old.
You entertain and astonish me in so many ways
with your good humour your huge heart
your sweetness and your Halle wisdom.
My only wish to be to stall time and sit with you and sit with you
sit with you
and learn from you and know you
At this time
At one year old
Halle, I am honored to be your mother
You too have given me the gift of love
Your Mama
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Not THAT Little
Halle Tierra
12 month Specs:
19.2 lbs (25th percentile)
74 cm (about 70th percentile - surprising)
Hmmm...we'll take it!
12 month Specs:
19.2 lbs (25th percentile)
74 cm (about 70th percentile - surprising)
Hmmm...we'll take it!
ONE
My baby turns one on Friday! I can not believe it! I think this year has been the fastest of my life.
It has been a whirlwind, but a good one.
Over these past 3.5 years I have grown to love babies so much. I have become gaga for them.
Halle is one but doesn't really look it - she is such a little pip-squeak with her big owl eyes - or lemur-like as Gramma Rose once accurately described her. But I think her petite stature makes her so cute. I can fling her around - she weighs nothing. - and clings and climbs like a lemur too which makes her even easier to hold. She is definitely still a baby to me.
I have little fantasies about having another little baby girl. I'd call her Maude. But a boy would be nice too, I just know girls. Anyway, I can't go there. It's interesting though, that if a baby was in the plans, I would be ready now, and I wasn't ready until quite a bit later after having Anneka. I guess we become accustomed to being busy and can't imagine it any other way.
Halle will have her one year check up today. Friday is a long work day for me, so her party will be this Saturday.
So proud of little Halle!
It has been a whirlwind, but a good one.
Over these past 3.5 years I have grown to love babies so much. I have become gaga for them.
Halle is one but doesn't really look it - she is such a little pip-squeak with her big owl eyes - or lemur-like as Gramma Rose once accurately described her. But I think her petite stature makes her so cute. I can fling her around - she weighs nothing. - and clings and climbs like a lemur too which makes her even easier to hold. She is definitely still a baby to me.
I have little fantasies about having another little baby girl. I'd call her Maude. But a boy would be nice too, I just know girls. Anyway, I can't go there. It's interesting though, that if a baby was in the plans, I would be ready now, and I wasn't ready until quite a bit later after having Anneka. I guess we become accustomed to being busy and can't imagine it any other way.
Halle will have her one year check up today. Friday is a long work day for me, so her party will be this Saturday.
So proud of little Halle!
Friday, January 21, 2011
Learning Limits
I haven't been feeling as upbeat lately. This is exhausting. Paul's back so that's good, but aside from filming on decent days, Paul has editing work, and aside from instructing, my job comes with many meetings, course revisions, curriculum and program development, professional development, marking and today, a certain issue that has come up with a student that has been rather consuming.
Wednesday and Thursday I reserve to be with the girls all day before I head to work in the early evening on Thursday. Unfortunately many meetings get scheduled on Thursdays. I usually opt out with seems to have been accepted, but yesterday was one which needed me there. So, I took the girls! I think it was refreshing for everyone having them there although it made it a bit hard to get through my agenda item and a couple of my colleagues looked a little perplexed by my allowing Halle to eat off the floor (or was that my imagination?). Anneka was really excited to see where I work, check out the classrooms, ride the elevator and eat in the cafeteria afterward. Halle was feeling super social and crawling around and visiting people during the meeting and in the cafeteria. I was able to introduce them to a number of my students that also have little kids which was quite fun for me, and I hope I made a bit of a point about scheduling meetings on certain people's days off!! (A little side agenda!)
I guess the silver lining in all of this is that my family time is sacred and not to be wasted or wished away. But as I said before the lack of personal time is taking a toll.
On Wednesday I took the girls to the Callaghan Nordic Site again. It was a another beautiful day. This time I discovered my limits. I took Anneka's downhill skis and boots and the plastic sled and carried all this gear in the chariot. We stopped at the learning area, strapped on Anneka's boots and skiis and with Halle on my back practiced making "pizza" (snowplough) and "french fries" and tromping around. Mostly she was between my legs. I had some trouble getting her boots on her and getting Halle strapped on my back and although she enjoyed it, Halle did not. Then I put them in the sled and sent them down the little hill. That was much easier. I sent them down a bigger hill. They capsized and Halle rodeo rolled over and over about three or four times. She was really upset, I felt bad. It was too much work for me. It was mentally exhausting staying patient and upbeat and physically taxing.
Finally I went for a ski, but by that time the kids had finished there snacks and were ready to get inside out of their gear and have some lunch, so I had to cut it short. I felt a bit sorry for myself because what I really wanted was to go for a vigorous ski.
It is a nice lodge and even mid-week there are other mums and kids there so it is always a nice social time for me and the girls. We hang out on the couches by the fireplace and Halle gets to stretch her limbs. Aside from C, I have yet to see another parent, let alone mum, hauling two little kids around. I'm sure they exist but they are few and far between. So if I can't manage the ski-learning/sledding part as well, I don't feel so bad. With all this effort and activity you'd think I'd be losing weight ...but no. I don't understand; maybe it's a change in my metabolism.
Wednesday and Thursday I reserve to be with the girls all day before I head to work in the early evening on Thursday. Unfortunately many meetings get scheduled on Thursdays. I usually opt out with seems to have been accepted, but yesterday was one which needed me there. So, I took the girls! I think it was refreshing for everyone having them there although it made it a bit hard to get through my agenda item and a couple of my colleagues looked a little perplexed by my allowing Halle to eat off the floor (or was that my imagination?). Anneka was really excited to see where I work, check out the classrooms, ride the elevator and eat in the cafeteria afterward. Halle was feeling super social and crawling around and visiting people during the meeting and in the cafeteria. I was able to introduce them to a number of my students that also have little kids which was quite fun for me, and I hope I made a bit of a point about scheduling meetings on certain people's days off!! (A little side agenda!)
I guess the silver lining in all of this is that my family time is sacred and not to be wasted or wished away. But as I said before the lack of personal time is taking a toll.
On Wednesday I took the girls to the Callaghan Nordic Site again. It was a another beautiful day. This time I discovered my limits. I took Anneka's downhill skis and boots and the plastic sled and carried all this gear in the chariot. We stopped at the learning area, strapped on Anneka's boots and skiis and with Halle on my back practiced making "pizza" (snowplough) and "french fries" and tromping around. Mostly she was between my legs. I had some trouble getting her boots on her and getting Halle strapped on my back and although she enjoyed it, Halle did not. Then I put them in the sled and sent them down the little hill. That was much easier. I sent them down a bigger hill. They capsized and Halle rodeo rolled over and over about three or four times. She was really upset, I felt bad. It was too much work for me. It was mentally exhausting staying patient and upbeat and physically taxing.
Finally I went for a ski, but by that time the kids had finished there snacks and were ready to get inside out of their gear and have some lunch, so I had to cut it short. I felt a bit sorry for myself because what I really wanted was to go for a vigorous ski.
It is a nice lodge and even mid-week there are other mums and kids there so it is always a nice social time for me and the girls. We hang out on the couches by the fireplace and Halle gets to stretch her limbs. Aside from C, I have yet to see another parent, let alone mum, hauling two little kids around. I'm sure they exist but they are few and far between. So if I can't manage the ski-learning/sledding part as well, I don't feel so bad. With all this effort and activity you'd think I'd be losing weight ...but no. I don't understand; maybe it's a change in my metabolism.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Blog Addict
I'm blogging a lot.
It's because I have no one to talk to. I tried to call an old friend and my mom by there's no one home. I was tempted to call a local friend to bring me a bottle of wine but that seemed pathetic. I could invite someone over to share it with me, but then I'd have to stay up later than 10 which is my bedtime. It has to be because I hate being tired and I have no relief. Ever. Day 8, going on 9, soon to be 10 and counting.
I do a lot during the day. I talk to tonnes of people: colleagues, students, G, the kids about all sorts of things. I'm talking most of the time, but I'm never debriefing. Well kind of - with Anneka. That's pretty funny. She's so funny and astute. Ms. Astrid thinks she is a very talented artist. I'm not bragging; she just is all this...and much more.
Debrief.
Rise at 5:45. Coffee, dress, marking, planning - check.
6:45 G arrives. Leave. Get another muffin and coffee for the road. Some CBC.
Work - check (enough said)
Arrive home 3:45
Kids fed, played with (doctor), bathed, teeth, Vit. D, cuddled, snuggled, tickled, kissed, read to, nursed, tucked in, asleep - check. (Halle is very snotty and has a bit of a fever. She's also a bit irritable.)
Kitchen cleaned, house tidied, floors swept, garbage out - check.
Overall energy left - good. Still going strong. Will drop dead asleep in 1.5 hours.
Mental alertness - just beginning to fade.
Physical body - could use a good workout followed by a yoga session.
Present motivation - nil.
Morale - could use some company and a glass of wine.
I'm on house arrest. Many nights over this last week, I've thought a glass of wine would be nice. This is probably the hardest thing about this solo gig - that glass of wine is right around the block, but may as well be in China.
It's because I have no one to talk to. I tried to call an old friend and my mom by there's no one home. I was tempted to call a local friend to bring me a bottle of wine but that seemed pathetic. I could invite someone over to share it with me, but then I'd have to stay up later than 10 which is my bedtime. It has to be because I hate being tired and I have no relief. Ever. Day 8, going on 9, soon to be 10 and counting.
I do a lot during the day. I talk to tonnes of people: colleagues, students, G, the kids about all sorts of things. I'm talking most of the time, but I'm never debriefing. Well kind of - with Anneka. That's pretty funny. She's so funny and astute. Ms. Astrid thinks she is a very talented artist. I'm not bragging; she just is all this...and much more.
Debrief.
Rise at 5:45. Coffee, dress, marking, planning - check.
6:45 G arrives. Leave. Get another muffin and coffee for the road. Some CBC.
Work - check (enough said)
Arrive home 3:45
Kids fed, played with (doctor), bathed, teeth, Vit. D, cuddled, snuggled, tickled, kissed, read to, nursed, tucked in, asleep - check. (Halle is very snotty and has a bit of a fever. She's also a bit irritable.)
Kitchen cleaned, house tidied, floors swept, garbage out - check.
Overall energy left - good. Still going strong. Will drop dead asleep in 1.5 hours.
Mental alertness - just beginning to fade.
Physical body - could use a good workout followed by a yoga session.
Present motivation - nil.
Morale - could use some company and a glass of wine.
I'm on house arrest. Many nights over this last week, I've thought a glass of wine would be nice. This is probably the hardest thing about this solo gig - that glass of wine is right around the block, but may as well be in China.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Cold, Sunny Sunday
 |
| Halle having breakfast before her big ski day stoked to be sitting at the big girl's table and eating toast with almond butter and jam. |
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| Anneka stoked to be allowed to have a wrap with peanut butter and jam for breakfast IN THE LIVING ROOM and WATCHING A MOVIE ON THE IPOD while Mum gets geared up. |
As soon as we woke, I knew we would be going skiing. No matter what. C adn the girls were up for it too. The first x-country ski of the year was hours of preparation, but finally it resulted in a great deal in a shared corporate pass which includes rental of the chariot. (Ummm...I also rear-ended someone as we were inching the last few hundred meters up the Callaghan because I was dealing on my cell phone. I felt horrible. It's all OK though. And, I'd rather not dwell on the bad.) It'll be much faster next time and there is no need to rush out and buy a ski attachment.
Finally we skiied. "Faster Mum, faster. You know why you fell Mum? Because you weren't doing a pizza. My Dad taught me how to ski. You have to do a pizza Mum. I want an icicle. Mum get me an icicle. I just saw a beautiful butterfly tree. Mum, did you know the Berenstein Bears live way up in a tree? I just saw a deer's house. Mum you're not going fast." And on, and on...It's great.
We left late after hanging and socializing in the lodge and ended up driving home in the dark. "The sun has it's blanket on. That's my star beside the moon. I see it everynight. Did you know the sun and the moon are friends?..." After a grocery shop for the week, putting the kids to bed, putting everything away and cleaning the kitchen, I would like to relax on the couch and read, but I know I should go to bed to have the energy for another full day. The girls are snoozing in our room again and I'll probably be joining them soon.
Friday, January 7, 2011
Ughhh, another divergent post.
I'm not particularly happy with my last post. It was a bit of a manic moment at the end of a work day. I think there are so many thoughts floating around in my head as we embark on this new chapter of working mummy, absent daddy, and nanny. Thoughts about my kids and how they are adjusting, thoughts about specifics of work, larger thoughts about life in general, and thoughts about details of food, exercise, health.
I happen to be very lucky right now in my overall health (colds aside) and my ability to stay calm, take things as they come, and achieve rest. I cringe a little when I read my last post, because I know things can be really hard for mothers (and fathers) and I don't want to be flippant or unsympathetic to other mothers who may have many questions about how best to cope, especially when it comes to getting rest. I know, because I've been there.
When I had to substitute teach in the mornings when Anneka was quite young with Paul away, I would have trouble settling at night because I would worry about all I had to do to get us both out the door in the morning and still leave myself enough time to be prepared for class. I found it very difficult. It was these sorts of worries that caused me to lose sleep, more so than any sleep interruptions.
I am able to cope now, because I am well rested. When one isn't well rested, thinking can become confused and problems seem bigger than they are. I don't think much beyond the next hour these days, if that. I still plan for things, but then I try to let them go. I remain organized enough that I don't forget (most) obligations, dates and duties, but take one thing at a time. It is the only way I can do this.
My kiddos are both in my room again. Anneka was definitely showing signs of wear tonight. She really wanted me to play with her duplo with her before bedtime even though she was so tired. She was so tired that even the usual before-bed routine (bath, snack etc.) took an tiresome amount of time and a fair amount of tears. I know she just wanted mummy time, but the duplo was too much. I read them stories in bed told her a story about when I was little and then turned off the lights. Still, Anneka sobbed herself to sleep (I think it was inevitable). Thank goodness it is the weekend and I can really be present with my kids.
Halle literally screamed. That is so unlike Halle, but she just seems so full of energy these days and after waking up from a nap at five, probably wasn't ready to go to sleep. She did, however, in her cooperative way, lay herself down and wait for sleep to come. She is full of surprises. She's not really showing any signs of wear and tear, and it was her, more than Anneka, I was worried about. She seems so excited about life and so happy. Friends who have seen her about, have even reported this to me, and apparently at Strong Start today, she was a crowd pleaser and a social butterfly. Any stranger anxiety, or apprehension has seemed to melt away over these last few weeks. Because Anneka is quite strong, independent, outgoing and perceptive, and now the eldest child, I forget sometimes that she is only three and she really is my little buddy. It's a lot for her to adjust to.
The most challenging thing for me is going to be the lack of down-time. I need it, but when I'm not working I feel like I need to make up the lost time with my kids, so I find myself trying to do even more as a mother, and letting them stay up a little later just so we can hang out.
This week was atypical of what it will be like though. Additional work obligations in this first week required me to be there all five days and the kids were under someone else's care (mostly G but one day at a friends) for 39 hours! Wow, they have actually done amazingly well. And to add to the stress on their little lives, Daddy has been away. (Paul, Anneka is asking about you so much - she really misses you!).
I happen to be very lucky right now in my overall health (colds aside) and my ability to stay calm, take things as they come, and achieve rest. I cringe a little when I read my last post, because I know things can be really hard for mothers (and fathers) and I don't want to be flippant or unsympathetic to other mothers who may have many questions about how best to cope, especially when it comes to getting rest. I know, because I've been there.
When I had to substitute teach in the mornings when Anneka was quite young with Paul away, I would have trouble settling at night because I would worry about all I had to do to get us both out the door in the morning and still leave myself enough time to be prepared for class. I found it very difficult. It was these sorts of worries that caused me to lose sleep, more so than any sleep interruptions.
I am able to cope now, because I am well rested. When one isn't well rested, thinking can become confused and problems seem bigger than they are. I don't think much beyond the next hour these days, if that. I still plan for things, but then I try to let them go. I remain organized enough that I don't forget (most) obligations, dates and duties, but take one thing at a time. It is the only way I can do this.
My kiddos are both in my room again. Anneka was definitely showing signs of wear tonight. She really wanted me to play with her duplo with her before bedtime even though she was so tired. She was so tired that even the usual before-bed routine (bath, snack etc.) took an tiresome amount of time and a fair amount of tears. I know she just wanted mummy time, but the duplo was too much. I read them stories in bed told her a story about when I was little and then turned off the lights. Still, Anneka sobbed herself to sleep (I think it was inevitable). Thank goodness it is the weekend and I can really be present with my kids.
Halle literally screamed. That is so unlike Halle, but she just seems so full of energy these days and after waking up from a nap at five, probably wasn't ready to go to sleep. She did, however, in her cooperative way, lay herself down and wait for sleep to come. She is full of surprises. She's not really showing any signs of wear and tear, and it was her, more than Anneka, I was worried about. She seems so excited about life and so happy. Friends who have seen her about, have even reported this to me, and apparently at Strong Start today, she was a crowd pleaser and a social butterfly. Any stranger anxiety, or apprehension has seemed to melt away over these last few weeks. Because Anneka is quite strong, independent, outgoing and perceptive, and now the eldest child, I forget sometimes that she is only three and she really is my little buddy. It's a lot for her to adjust to.
The most challenging thing for me is going to be the lack of down-time. I need it, but when I'm not working I feel like I need to make up the lost time with my kids, so I find myself trying to do even more as a mother, and letting them stay up a little later just so we can hang out.
This week was atypical of what it will be like though. Additional work obligations in this first week required me to be there all five days and the kids were under someone else's care (mostly G but one day at a friends) for 39 hours! Wow, they have actually done amazingly well. And to add to the stress on their little lives, Daddy has been away. (Paul, Anneka is asking about you so much - she really misses you!).
Snapshot
Have you ever had a male coworker walk into your office while you are pumping breastmilk?
Halle and Anneka, oh dear, Halle and Anneka. I think you are doing fine. I'm sure it will get tough but we are off to a good start. It will be nice when Paul-Daddy is home.
I return home at 7:20pm after being away for 6 hours doing some pre-term prep and teaching my first class. I look quietly through the front window to see G and the girls sitting together on the couching reading and talking. Anneka is engaged, Halle is trying to climb over the side of the couch to get to the book shelf. I can hear her shrieking her excited shriek.
I open the door and Halle goes nuts giggling and squealing and dragging G who is holding her hands in my direction. She is all over me and can't get to the boob fast enough. Anneka is talking but is busy at the coffee table and doesn't look up. Halle is being too noisy for me to hear everything Anneka is saying, but I catch "Did you miss me, Mum?"
"I missed you so much, did you miss me?"
- "Yes."
"You missed me so much that you can't even be bothered to look up when I get home?"
She looks up and smiles her wicked smile. They are both in great spirits and although they are bathed, in PJ's and have been fed dinner, I can't get them to sleep until 8:30. Halle is full of beans, but is so obedient about going to sleep she lies down in the playpen beside our bed anyway. Anneka wants a snack.
"Where would you like to sleep?"
"In your bed."
"Oh, OK."
When I take Anneka in Halle stands up. I tuck Anneka in and lie Halle back down. "Don't talk to Halle" I tell Anneka. She doesn't and I walk out.
Anneka falls asleep SO quickly in our big comfy bed (even through Halle's attempts to get her attention) but Halle stands up and starts crying for her and me. I leave, go and eat and tidy up a bit in the kitchen (it's mostly been tidied). Halle cries for a bit before she lies herself back down. It doesn't bother me. She's there with Anneka, knows how to put herself to sleep, is in her familiar environment and I need to eat.
This is how we sleep when Paul's gone. We have a King sized bed and Anneka has taken to crawling into our bed in the middle of the night anyway. It may seem a regression. Anneka slept all night with no disturbances from 13months to 2 years 4 months in her own bed (and from 18 months without a pull up). One month before Halle was born, she started staking her territory.
Sleeping with and nursing Anneka during the night, although she was generally a fairly good sleeper, was harder for me the first time. I wanted her beside me, but I did not always fall back to sleep so easily, sometimes I would lie awake thinking. Although there would be periods of time when I would barely wake up, I would be deceiving myself by saying it was always so lovely sleeping together. I think this first time around, there would have been no perfect solution. It was just my adjustment to motherhood and my adjustment to sleep interruption and sleep deprevation, and some anxiety that these things manufactured. With Anneka next to me, was how I coped the best, but she certainly did not suffer from sleeping alone, she began getting really solid sleeps. In retrospect I would probably do things with Anneka the same way, I would just think about it less!
With Halle, you couldn't keep me awake. If neither she nor Anneka bug me all night long which does happen every once in a while, I sleep all night, uninterrupted. To wake up a 7 and realize it is your first wake-up is positively blissful. Even with the 1 - 3 night feedings Halle usually demands, I feel pretty good these days, as long as I put myself to bed early. I am actually lucky in that I have only experience low-grade sleep deprivation from time to time, this time around. I am lucky in that both my babies have been pretty good about sleeping a stretch of a decent length of time, (yes, there have been rough patches) and I am never awake thinking this second time around. It doesn't really bother me where any of us sleep as long as we sleep, and I seem to be able to sleep the sleep of a non-parent.
Halle started sleeping on her own accord in her own playpen bed since seven months. She stopped falling asleep at the breast, started sucking her blanket and I found she went back to sleep more quickly in her own bed. Unlike with Anneka, I've never felt any unease, either, about her sleeping separately. Until, I clear out some of Anneka's toys there is no option for Halle to move into Anneka's room either. So here we are in 2011, all in Mama's bed! I LOVE IT....but I don't think Paul will.
I justify this easiest option, but saying, "Hey look, Halle and Anneka have gotten used to going to bed at the same time in the same room!" It's true. They have, they do. They are sisters, going to bed together and sleeping together.
One day they will be sisters sleeping together in their own bedroom!!
How did this post turn out about sleep? All this said, and since I'm on sleep, I wonder when I'll night wean Halle. I just start thinking I might tackle it, when she goes and sleeps all night on her own, then I start hoping maybe she'll be a baby that does it on her own. I wouldn't put it past Halle. We can always hope!
Halle and Anneka, oh dear, Halle and Anneka. I think you are doing fine. I'm sure it will get tough but we are off to a good start. It will be nice when Paul-Daddy is home.
I return home at 7:20pm after being away for 6 hours doing some pre-term prep and teaching my first class. I look quietly through the front window to see G and the girls sitting together on the couching reading and talking. Anneka is engaged, Halle is trying to climb over the side of the couch to get to the book shelf. I can hear her shrieking her excited shriek.
I open the door and Halle goes nuts giggling and squealing and dragging G who is holding her hands in my direction. She is all over me and can't get to the boob fast enough. Anneka is talking but is busy at the coffee table and doesn't look up. Halle is being too noisy for me to hear everything Anneka is saying, but I catch "Did you miss me, Mum?"
"I missed you so much, did you miss me?"
- "Yes."
"You missed me so much that you can't even be bothered to look up when I get home?"
She looks up and smiles her wicked smile. They are both in great spirits and although they are bathed, in PJ's and have been fed dinner, I can't get them to sleep until 8:30. Halle is full of beans, but is so obedient about going to sleep she lies down in the playpen beside our bed anyway. Anneka wants a snack.
"Where would you like to sleep?"
"In your bed."
"Oh, OK."
When I take Anneka in Halle stands up. I tuck Anneka in and lie Halle back down. "Don't talk to Halle" I tell Anneka. She doesn't and I walk out.
Anneka falls asleep SO quickly in our big comfy bed (even through Halle's attempts to get her attention) but Halle stands up and starts crying for her and me. I leave, go and eat and tidy up a bit in the kitchen (it's mostly been tidied). Halle cries for a bit before she lies herself back down. It doesn't bother me. She's there with Anneka, knows how to put herself to sleep, is in her familiar environment and I need to eat.
This is how we sleep when Paul's gone. We have a King sized bed and Anneka has taken to crawling into our bed in the middle of the night anyway. It may seem a regression. Anneka slept all night with no disturbances from 13months to 2 years 4 months in her own bed (and from 18 months without a pull up). One month before Halle was born, she started staking her territory.
Sleeping with and nursing Anneka during the night, although she was generally a fairly good sleeper, was harder for me the first time. I wanted her beside me, but I did not always fall back to sleep so easily, sometimes I would lie awake thinking. Although there would be periods of time when I would barely wake up, I would be deceiving myself by saying it was always so lovely sleeping together. I think this first time around, there would have been no perfect solution. It was just my adjustment to motherhood and my adjustment to sleep interruption and sleep deprevation, and some anxiety that these things manufactured. With Anneka next to me, was how I coped the best, but she certainly did not suffer from sleeping alone, she began getting really solid sleeps. In retrospect I would probably do things with Anneka the same way, I would just think about it less!
With Halle, you couldn't keep me awake. If neither she nor Anneka bug me all night long which does happen every once in a while, I sleep all night, uninterrupted. To wake up a 7 and realize it is your first wake-up is positively blissful. Even with the 1 - 3 night feedings Halle usually demands, I feel pretty good these days, as long as I put myself to bed early. I am actually lucky in that I have only experience low-grade sleep deprivation from time to time, this time around. I am lucky in that both my babies have been pretty good about sleeping a stretch of a decent length of time, (yes, there have been rough patches) and I am never awake thinking this second time around. It doesn't really bother me where any of us sleep as long as we sleep, and I seem to be able to sleep the sleep of a non-parent.
Halle started sleeping on her own accord in her own playpen bed since seven months. She stopped falling asleep at the breast, started sucking her blanket and I found she went back to sleep more quickly in her own bed. Unlike with Anneka, I've never felt any unease, either, about her sleeping separately. Until, I clear out some of Anneka's toys there is no option for Halle to move into Anneka's room either. So here we are in 2011, all in Mama's bed! I LOVE IT....but I don't think Paul will.
I justify this easiest option, but saying, "Hey look, Halle and Anneka have gotten used to going to bed at the same time in the same room!" It's true. They have, they do. They are sisters, going to bed together and sleeping together.
One day they will be sisters sleeping together in their own bedroom!!
How did this post turn out about sleep? All this said, and since I'm on sleep, I wonder when I'll night wean Halle. I just start thinking I might tackle it, when she goes and sleeps all night on her own, then I start hoping maybe she'll be a baby that does it on her own. I wouldn't put it past Halle. We can always hope!
Monday, January 3, 2011
Post Festivas
Oh, I love my title, a double entendre. Am I clever? I feel clever - is that OK?
I feel very clever for having a wonderful "G" (that's she who cannot be named) or "helper", aka "nanny". Actually it is Paul who is clever for putting a simple ad on craigslist and finding her, not I who posted ads with nanny services describing a hypothetical "Nanny McPhee" or "Maria" thereby probably intimidating many good prospects.
G came today and is taking over three days/week as I transition to a 30 hour work week. We spent the morning going through routines, food and all sorts of details of the young people's lives while Anneka was at morning preschool and Halle was napping. Their lives are actually simple, as they should be. Luckily for G my children are dreamy - hehe. Well, Halle is a dream baby and they are both loaded with exuberance and personality. Where did they get it from - teehee?
Organization. Something I desire to have - so much that sometimes it runs my life. This day is about getting organized for the next chapter. Watch out! The next chapter will be a fast read, so action packed will it be. Paul will be in the Koots by tomorrow and then where? and then where? before he ends up in Norway and Mamma will be slogging away at the grind. Thank you G. I know you are going to be wonderful with the girls and we are all going to get along just great.
Yesterday was about blowing off all that needed to be reorganized after returning home from the holidays and about having fun! Man was I a B, I, T, C, H the day before. Why? Because even though Christmas was a bit of a rest with lots of other adults around and the cousins for playing and I went for a couple of runs and hikes, did yoga, visited friends and went to the pub, there were still kids to dress, feed, put to sleep and look after through it all. Yesterday I had a ski day. No, not a slog with kids in tow, a Whistler Mountain ski day with a good buddy! So fun! What a view. Man, Paul, you have pursued the dream. GOOD FOR YOU! xox
I feel very clever for having a wonderful "G" (that's she who cannot be named) or "helper", aka "nanny". Actually it is Paul who is clever for putting a simple ad on craigslist and finding her, not I who posted ads with nanny services describing a hypothetical "Nanny McPhee" or "Maria" thereby probably intimidating many good prospects.
G came today and is taking over three days/week as I transition to a 30 hour work week. We spent the morning going through routines, food and all sorts of details of the young people's lives while Anneka was at morning preschool and Halle was napping. Their lives are actually simple, as they should be. Luckily for G my children are dreamy - hehe. Well, Halle is a dream baby and they are both loaded with exuberance and personality. Where did they get it from - teehee?
Organization. Something I desire to have - so much that sometimes it runs my life. This day is about getting organized for the next chapter. Watch out! The next chapter will be a fast read, so action packed will it be. Paul will be in the Koots by tomorrow and then where? and then where? before he ends up in Norway and Mamma will be slogging away at the grind. Thank you G. I know you are going to be wonderful with the girls and we are all going to get along just great.
Yesterday was about blowing off all that needed to be reorganized after returning home from the holidays and about having fun! Man was I a B, I, T, C, H the day before. Why? Because even though Christmas was a bit of a rest with lots of other adults around and the cousins for playing and I went for a couple of runs and hikes, did yoga, visited friends and went to the pub, there were still kids to dress, feed, put to sleep and look after through it all. Yesterday I had a ski day. No, not a slog with kids in tow, a Whistler Mountain ski day with a good buddy! So fun! What a view. Man, Paul, you have pursued the dream. GOOD FOR YOU! xox
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