Twice in One Day

Twice in one day I felt my stomach sink and my pulse speed up.

First the voice said it was Whistler Mountain calling.  That was on my way home from work and my first thought was "Paul".  But someone had found my sun glasses at the Nordic site.  Actually good news.

Secondly a knock on the door just after I put the kids to bed.  A young man stood on the porch with that sun/windburned face, glowing teeth and eyes and wild hair of someone just getting back from the mountains.  "Hi Emily" - he had a European accent and seemed slightly awkward.  My thought - "pro-snowboarder...haven't met ... bad news..Paul".  And then that sinking feeling.  Just G's boyfriend picking up her phone she left here.

I don't like it, I don't like it at all.   But I hear the truck pull up outside.  All's well.  Another day.  Mostly I've ceased to worry.  It's been too many years.  So many nights past 9pm, even 10.  Once in Pemby got the search party together and were about to head out when the truck pulled up.

It bothers me when things happen in pairs; it feels like a warning to complete the trilogy.  I guess I'm superstitious.  P just got in and told me it was one of the gnarliest drives home he's had on the coast - had to pull over multiple times.  Maybe that's all it was about.

What a terrible, morbid post.

Our family dog just passed on, and I've been feeling very sad.  Maybe it's all about that.

On a positive note:  it's puking and I might have a chance to ski the hill tomorrow if Paul doesn't film.  Yes!

And on the rest of the home front, all is well.  Yesterday I took an hour off work and attended a three year old Valentine's Day tea at Anneka's school.  I had a great time and enjoyed watching Anneka shining brightly with excitement and pride.  Halle is inquisitive and adventurous.  She pushes chairs up to counters and climbs up on them.  I caught her with my toothbrush at the bathroom sink this evening - too cute.

Sleep has been less than perfect.  Hal's nursing a few times a night and it's starting to get to me.  Anymore than twice and I really notice.  I don't like that either.  I like to be productive and energetic.  I'm so much better at everything when I'm well rested and much more patient.

Maybe night wean soonish....